After the demoralizing run yesterday night, I went on my typical walk during my lunch...only it didn't end as a walk. A thing that Eric showed me yesterday was how his running and walking form don't really alter much. So I decided to try and run on the treadmill at a VERY SLOW SPEED (about 3.5 MPH) and keeping my HR further below the threshold that I had yesterday (yesterday's limit was 147 bpm, today's limit was set to 128 bpm.)
To my suprise, I was able to maintain my form and run while keeping my HR below 128 bpm! WTF? So if I run at a dictated speed and keep my stride short and light, I end up running at a lower effort. If I try and go faster, my heart rate goes nuts.
I hope the VO2Max test on Tuesday will give me an answer on where I am at, so I can take some of the guesswork out of doing this. As much as I appreciate the advice and info I've researched, I have to do my best to find what works for me. God, I hope that comes sooner than later.
One thing with the 30 minutes on the treadmill today...I felt more "in the moment" than I had yesterday and actually enjoyed myself for a change. That's the running I like and a reminder of why I do what I do and why I like doing it for hours on end.